Rather a Wrong Number

Today a story that I think happened.  I suppose I should know, I was there after all.

It was 1983.  I was starting my second year of residency.  I and another fellow were doing a medicine rotation at the local VA hospital.  They have a new one now but at the time it was exactly what you think of when you conjure up an image of a VA.  Old.  Red brick construction.  Inefficient.

Being free labor for them Joe and I were given all sorts of jobs normally done by others.  We ran stress tests for instance.  Oh, and all post discharge planning and arrangements were our responsibility.

We had a patient who needed to be discharged to a nursing home in another part of the state.  And of course it fell to us to make the necessary calls.  

Now the VA at this time was using something called the Federal W.A.T.S. system.  The acronym stood for wide area telephone system and it was a way to make long distance calls without long distance charges.  Or helpful operators.  It was, well did I mention the inefficient part?

So I dialed the number of the nursing home.  The phone was answered on the second ring with the words "White House".  Now, I was not born yesterday so my first thought was that there might be a "White House Bar" in - as I recall it - Spenser South Dakota.  So I asked "Um, you mean the actual White House?"  

There was a pause before an entirely humorless voice assured me that I had indeed called THE White House.  And it wasn't the gift shop either.

That conversation was over quickly.

So, what actually happened?  Given the clunky nature of the VA specifically and the Federal Government generally I believed at the time that indeed, I had inadvertently called 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.  But if instead I was being punked then I belatedly salute the unknown Master who pulled it off.  No imitating Ronald Reagan, no emotion other than palpable annoyance.  Perfect timing.

No, I still believe that I accidently called The White House.  Lordy I hope the phone that rang on that end was not red.