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Friday, December 12, 2025

The Cosmology of Canines

After looking at the petty crimes of dogs I've come around to the notion that they do have the concept of Good and Evil.  I mean, how else could you explain their reactions to the benevolent praise of "Good Dog", and the rarely used but powerful "BAD DOG"?  But do dogs have a more complex belief system.  Do they have a sort of religion?

Of course such questions are impossible to answer definitively, at least in this life.  But I have opinions.  Robots are all Hindu, or maybe Buddhist.  Cats are amoral Nihilists.

Dogs certainly have the concept of Beings - some good some evil - of greater power.  For Hank at least, here's the Good side:  Me.  My wife, who by virtue of being the main grocery shopper is regarded as The Food Bringer.  My son, Hank's original owner.  I think he outranks me, as Hank's memories in that regard were established early.  I guess collectively we are a sort of Trinity.

On the neutral side is Bear, the gigantic neighbor dog who is  shaman of the local dog congregation.  When Bear barks, all must bark.  It's rather liturgical.  

And the Evil side the Demonology includes: Squirrels, Delivery People, and anyone operating a rake, lawn mower or any powered or unpowered snow removal equipment.

Welcome to pantheism.

The most powerful of the Demons can't be seen, but their Presence is fearfully evident in other ways.  When we are up north during hunting season a single gunshot miles away sets him to quivering.  A second one turns him around and sends him pulling me back to the safety of Home. 

Not even the protective vestments of orange can banish the terror of the Great Loud Ones from Beyond.....

See also thunder, fireworks and the civil defense siren that gets tested at noon on the first Wednesday of every month.

I must admit the possibility that dogs actually have a more advanced religion.  Hey, never forget that "Fido" actually derives from Fides, or Faith.  Eugene ONeill thought that some dogs were Muslim.  He could be right, although Islam generally looks on dogs with disfavor.*  And regards Hank, well, this brief video speaks for itself.  He only needs to hear a few stirring notes before dashing for his place of worship and rapture, the food bowl.


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* The Islamic disapproval of dogs as unclean seems to relate to their saliva!  And, knowing what they eat, lick and barf back up, I can see solid logic in this.



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