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Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Repent! A million pounds of fat

Much of the "cuisine" at the Minnesota State Fair is sold from small booths out on the grounds.  But there actually is a Food Building.  For aficionados of greasy food this is a sacred place, the Oily of Oilys if you will.  So imagine my surprise when I walked up to one of the doors of it and saw:

You have got to be kidding.  Here of all places, in the Tabernacle of Triglycerides you are actually going to encourage people to get blood pressure, blood sugar and cholesterol screening?  Well, actually, yes.


This is the weight screening area.  Note, and note ye well, that of all my State Fair pictures this is the sole example that contains no people whatsoever.  It asks the rhetorical question "What weighs one Million Pounds?".  Well, lets do the math.  If the attendance on a rather nice Sunday was 200,000, and if each attendee was carrying an extra five pounds of fat. (Yes, I realize a few with less, many with so very much more)....you could step outside the empty health screening area and look upon a million pounds of fat.  Much of it constrained within clothing that appeared unequal to the challenge.

Pah, enough of these misguided rice cake eating moralists.  Around a different corner of the Food Building..
Neon always works for Sin.  It is the graphics of Vegas, and of old fashioned liquor stores, and of the hellish alternate Bedford Falls as seen by a delirious George Bailey.


This was directly across the lane from the entrance to the Health Fair.  I suspect the rice cake eaters felt a little like Salvation Army bell ringers next to a brothel.

I usually gaze in wonder upon the vile viands but seldom consume them.  But I did see one item that just could not be passed up.  We asked for and received a small sampling of:
Mmmmmm, Deep Fried Spam Curds.  A couple of the deep brown cubes 'o death were enough.

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